I just blew up the bathroom at work and now I feel like a new woman
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
Who wants vodka and apple sauce
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
We have such limited time together he literally sends me text messages that are like "I sent my roommates on an impossible quest, we have 15 minutes." it's that bad.
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
Dude in the stall next to me shitting and sobbing. Dude another stall over, "Come on bro, you gotta loosen up." This is why I don't shit in public.
burned my penis with a sauteed onion again.
Apparently I drunkenly told him I was going to ride him to the rodeo and break him like a bronco, then I stole his nachos and beer. Adulting is hard!!!
Long story short wrist restraints, Apple Watch and cumming all don’t mix
Randomize
