did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
This glow in the dark vibrator will get me through this power outage
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
my fraternity brothers just had an intervention for me. i either have a problem or am just on some next-level shit, im gonna go with door number 2
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
thats it. im teaching my cat how to use a fire alarm
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
Until this weekend, a man hadn't made me orgasm since the night Obama was elected. Now THAT is change I can believe in.
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
He just said Bill Nye is just a dude. If I ever considered sleeping with him, I never will now.
My autobiography will be 500 pages of the words "I probably should've thought this through" typed over and over.
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
Randomize
