Why did u sent me a picture of a dead horse?
i could hear you having sex and was jealous, wanted to kill the mood
I don't wanna do a drive in or see a movie tonight. I wanna play some Golden Tee and butt fuck a girl in the bathroom of some bar and proceed with Golden Tee
I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
i carry sandwiches in my pockets more than any normal person should
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
im eating mac and cheese with a makeup brush. there is wayyyyy too much wrong with this night.
Not every day do you see a hooker getting arrested at noon. Just kidding, we live in Reno.
Chipotle farts are not good for seducing boys.
So...a chick sucked my crank...now her dog is licking my feet. I feel like a pharoh on vacation.
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
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