You realize if you die tommorow, the last memory i'll ever have of you is your ballsack on skype
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...
My mom just walked in and saw a picture of his penis. She then asked me "Do you even have a cervix left?!" I don't know what to feel anymore HA
Yeah well that's a good thing right? Like mothers approval? Kinda like a Fathers blessing but. . . better?
His cat watched us the ENTIRE time. Every time I glanced over the poor kitty looked at me as if I were pelvic thrusting her father to death.
I just chugged whiskey at 7 AM because going to breakfasts at Brendas doesnt seem right if Im not real drunk. I feel like when Brenda takes my order she can tell Im drunk and will take care of me.
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
Don't judge me. It's a Monday night and I can eat burritos in while bathing in the kitchen sink if I want to.
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
Randomize