You were right. It hurts to walk today.
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
He passed out while I was riding him, and just when I was about to call it quits he opens his eyes and squeezes my boobs and goes Honk! Honk!
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
nobody understands how my tooth became embedded in the ceiling last night.
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
Half the people who compete die. All the rest either lose their minds or grow an innate fear of sharks, vodka, and fishbowls
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
He was so drunk we almost didn't even make it to his place because he didn't know where he lived
I'm going to get drunk, come back, call my grandma, and eat all those scrambled eggs.
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
I found my parents stash of sex toys. You know my green one? My mom has it...in purple. I HAVE THE SAME VIBRATOR AS MY MOTHER
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