My dignity? Collapsing on itself like a dying star.
She looked like her face caught fire, and someone put it out with a screwdriver.
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
I love seeing you outside of a bar. It's like seeing a dog walk on its hind legs
Just gave advice in krystal burger while holding and pointing with a corona to a 3 year old, told her to enjoy her stroller time while it lasts. The mom pushed her away fast.
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
No he didn't understand the sequence...then I started texting him these texts with vagina strategically spelt correctly in jumbles of letters.
it's not like i was drunk to the point of NEEDING help...i just wanted someone to offer to hold my hair or something.
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
I need like a hormone stopper. Or a chastity belt. Or like a lady business alarm that goes off when I'm being too drunk.
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
last night is slowly putting itself back together. Its one giant slutty puzzle, all the pieces are covered in tequila and shame.
APPARENTLY I MISSED SOMEONE SWALLOWING A WHOLE BAG OF METH WHILE I WAS ON BREAK.
Randomize
