It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
Our neighbors just passed us a blunt from their deck, and are hooking us up.
I just baked them cookies. We're friends now.
Don't ask me how or why, but I'm drunk with German diplomats. Come over. Now
do you remember when we thought we were both knocked up by the same guy like two days apart and would have half twins? Thats a best friend moment.
ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or
think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
Had sex with the Irish bartender in Spain. So that happened.
I don't remember coming in last night, but apparently I ate a piece of pizza because when I woke up I had pizza crust stuck to the back of my thighs.
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
I'm sorry I tried to spit drugs down your throat like a baby bird last night.
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
Randomize
