your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
I told him I would sleep with him if he could name all the colors of the wind.
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
Exotic beer tasting at my apt right now and by that I mean I bought random beer and I'm drinking it on my balcony
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
Is drinking before noon still a bad idea if you invent an amazing cocktail?
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
For a man with no legs he was surprisingly good at doggy style.
I don't know whether to high-five you or stage an intervention.
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
Are you ok?!
I assume I've stopped bleeding because I haven't passed out, but can't verify currently.
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
Randomize
