I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
She keeps telling me I can't keep feeding the dog my food. I gave half the weed brownie to the dog and half to me. I just want it to taste the greatness of cheezits like I am.
i just stole a 8 pack of olde english 40s and 2 roles of duct tape. we are going to make edward proud tonight.
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
I FOUND THE LEGS
On a scale of one to Harambe, how attached were you to your goldfish?
Pretty sure I just scored Election Day sex based on the theory that if either of these fools win the world as we know it is over so we might as well get a few orgasms in...
This Cougar is looking at me like I’m a piece of meat and buying me top shelf cocktails
I’m getting a fear boner thinking about what she might do to me
Randomize
