using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
I'm drinking a margarita out of my 'best bj' trophy and it tastes like victory.
She compared sex to doing dishes."You scrub them until they're wet."
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
Should I mail that cop his nightstick or just throw it away?
We're about to go to a party titled 'Night of 1000 Jello Shots".
All I've eaten today is cookie dough, pecan pie and three shots of jack. Finals week here I come.
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
I hope you have a dream of a sloth with my face touching you erotically
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
I just projectile vomited into my kitchen sink. Today need to be over already.
i'm gonna friendzone myself so you dont have to
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
Hi,\n\nYou left your underwear in my Uber. Thanks and bye.
Randomize
