Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
Yeah. He most definitely jizzed himself in the face.
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
What the fuck. The girl next to me just looked at her phone, put her stuff away, and popped a birth control and ran out of class. Lucky fucking guy.
She just drank the vanilla extract. Again. AGAIN. No one should be that eager to get drunk.
Btw before you ask, the dr said there's no way shoving his dick that far down my throat is why i got laryngitis
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
You finished the fifth and then hid two dozen eggs around your apartment and declare that you would "quest for Jesus". Have fun questing today.
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
There is nothing wrong with me introducing you as elephant dick. Nothing.
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
Dude I puked in a snow bank and then fell face first into it
This was the first funeral I've ever attended where I had to pee behind a bush cuz someone was passed-out drunk in the locked bathroom. Steve would have been proud.
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