Tell him to shut up cuz i said so. I lost my dollar shoe :(
SEEEEXXX PLEASE
Mission leave-the-puke-on-the-floor-til-the-dog-eats-it completed. I work smarter not harder
I turn the corner to find her walking in the front door in a tee-shirt, two different shoes and no pants. All she said to me was "I'm sad"
My head weighs 7 pounds. i know this because i spent the majority of the night passed out in the bathroom, using the scale as a pillow.
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
After i black out, be a good friend and point me to the direction of a girl with daddy issues, any girl would do just fine
I just threw in a dip with a guy that superglued his fake tooth back in today. My life is complete.
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
I'm eating pizza in the bathtub
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
Please don't give away my fajitas
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
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