fun fact: cucumber in vinegar with pepper = best ever high snack
Unfortunately, they didn't pull of their wake and bake plans. Instead, they waked and vomited like a half-retarded giraffe till everyone woke up.
if i died would you start the facebook group?
Sitting on the floor in my kitchen eating taquitos. Being this drunk the next day has lost its allure post graduation.
Well when you're drinking tequila mixed with water out of a steve Austin cup I really don't think acquiring a straw is your main priority
Found my phone laying in a snow angel outside my apt this morning.
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
you were like "guys ... i think i got fingered while dancing tonight"
our poor poor cab driver
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
Ok, maybe playing "whose family is most dysfunctional" wasn't the best drunk idea we've had. Todd''s been crying in the bathroom for an hour. We can't get him out...
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
I peed in my closet, which at the time looked like a sparkly bathroom...
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