the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
If the boyfriend of the drunk girl you just met asks her if she made a "special friend" you're going to have a threesome. For future reference.
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
Siri makes being stoned even easier. I don't even Have to type my texts myself
Though I typed a half of that one
someone cut his neck open pretty bad with a broken beer bottle. We were so close to his house that we carried him home, but when we got there he casually laid on his bed and said he was just gonna sleep it off. WHO DOES THAT
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
I walked out and he was covered in jelly, slithering around the floor. I don't know how to process that.
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
I think I offered a man a blowjob for his power ranger suite last night...
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
I’m good. I learned that a guy ate the mushrooms that were growing out of his toilet, so there’s that.
Randomize
