You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
I'm on my "fiiiiirrrst" glass of wine- the quotes mean it's the last of the bottle- so I really need you to pick up your phone so we can talk about this
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
Our fuck buddy relationship took a turn for the worst after we were drunk and I punched him in the face when he asked for a three some with my best friend.
I sat down next to him and my bra just unhooked itself
Apparently coming home smelling like I took a bath in beer is frowned upon in this household. I'm so glad I don't actually live here.
Bring me that man meat
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
Thank god for Taco Bell keeping you out of jail
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
He jerked off some dude with a slice of Wonder Bread.
The sports guy?
Yeah. They claimed the bread made it hetero
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