goodnight i made you a song goodbye
i already hear my dad disowning me
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
I got us chalkboard mugs. Now whoever comes home with us can feel comfortable in the morning! I am too considerate to my one-night stands...
And have you ever tried to explain a hickey to your own grandmother?
I think this agreement was sent by God. I get to do my own thing, get laid, and he still makes me breakfast in the morning.
I found three vicadin and a pint of fireball with the note. In case of emergency drink me under their sink.
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
At one point we were both in the bathroom and i was taking a shit while holding your hair as you puked in the sink. Friendship.
The weekend was a blur. There was vodka and penises and orgasms. I played a game of Cock Roulette and won big
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