but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
you left a giant bottle of vodka in my room from last night. does this serve as a parting gift or hush money?
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
I'm too tired to go all the way tonight, especially if you're going to quote Katy Perry at me during
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
drunk guy next to me on the train just tried to share his pizza with me
he just tried to feed it to me...i love new york
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
It is super hard to find a good vegan dominatrix! THAT'S why I'm single
Note to self: if you decide to go to the gym when you're coming down from your day high to shoot some hoops, do NOT play pickup basketball with the big black dudes who need a sixth
i'm pretty sure you can't sue someone for "Taking a shit on my kitchen floor."
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
Randomize
