If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
Hey just to warn you theres a really fat guy passed out in front of our front door snoring. Don't touch him, he's in god's hands now.
She's running around bumping into to people trying to keep a balloon she filled with vodka in the air. Please tell me she has a secret off switch you didn't tell me about.
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
Well, on the plus side, the hospital gave me a shirt that says "Makes a bad ass look good"
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
Why did I wake up to grapes taped my ears ?
Sorry dude, we didn't want you to hear us. Seemed like a good idea at the time.
You screamed at oncoming traffic , "five dollars to punch this guy in taint!".
i came outside and he was eating her out on my lawn. i refuse to pick up the dog shit in my yard so i hope he chose the spot wisely
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
It's only ok to pee out the window in the afternoon when you're drunk.
Not going to lie, when I looked in the tub I expected to see what might have been remnants of a squirrel.
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