that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
As a pleasant surprise..I woke to find a Burrito and Bottle of Gatorade .....Merry XMAS to ME
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
Family of uber douches all wearing ed hardy in a hummer taking up 2 parking spots at starbucks. Please be more cliche
He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
You talked about giving to sperm banks on a first date. What did you expect?
The cute guy in my class hurt himself and is on crutches. My first thought was "Good. He'll be easier to take down." Like he's a gazelle and I'm a dick tiger. What's wrong with me?
you smell like cheap hookers & chicken nuggets.
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
I had to reschedule my trainer meeting so now I'm just here eating hot pockets
It's not stalking if you do it on LinkedIn...
it was an ACCIDENT
it was a DICK
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
Randomize