I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
you told me your penis was albino and it couldnt be exposed to light so you needed to keep it in me
Theres a dude at this concert at the urinal double fisting beers, taking drinks from both while simultaneously pissing euerywhere. He is my hero
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
We're gona eat taco bell and then take exlax and see who can hold it in the longest. Loser has to pay for drinks all weekend. You in?
I can't promise that. They just put an extra shot in my margarita.
I like her. She smells like old lady but tastes like whiskey
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
I was gonna start crying but as he was asking me for my info i saw him eyeing my rack. So I sorta started pushing them together. He asked me to get out of the car he made me turn around so he could check me out and then he said and I quote "okay ma'am. Everything is fine, I'm going to let you off with a warning. Next time if you're not wearing yoga pants you might not be as lucky" I am blessed.
Dude...I slept walked to the free condom bin in the lounge last night. I don't know why.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
Randomize
