she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
You can't date a girl from every country.
I'm the captain planet of women
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
I just found a babydoll head in my sink where we ripped it off and did shots out of it.
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
Promise me you won't have sex in my room
I can't promise you that, but I promise you that I'll try
Might want to in your tub tho. That thing is fucking huge.
I'm driving while wearing hulk hands
I fill condoms, not promises.
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
How do I have sand in my vagina if we were an hour away from the beach?
I'm all dressed in my outfit from last night, and I'm not even the sluttiest person in Walmart right now. God bless Miami.
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
Banged a girl last night wearing nothing but my Team USA Olympic jersey. I think it's safe to say that nut was for America.
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
Randomize
