I wish i was in the wii world.
So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
I just sent him 3 long ass texts about how to tell a girl how he feels. I should get a fucking friend zone medal.
I will make you one.
Good. It needs "forever alone" engraved on it
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
I will buy you batman underwear babe. I'll make sure you wear them every time we have to adult.
Update: drank half a bottle of Bourbon and texted three ex's. Waiting for the roommates to go to sleep so I can raid the fridge.
You do it and I'll burn these mermaid pants so help me God.
Fuck you. All I remember from last night is telling random people that I'm in a "judgement free zone" then I threw up
A condom just fell out of me. Happy Tuesday.
I SHOULD BE TERRIFIED OF HIS DRAGON DICK.
Randomize