I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
i realized i had a pad on before i went to this guys house so i stuck it in his neighbors shrub.
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
The first clue should've been that he literally had shit in his hair. How does that even happen?
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
Dude. Cab ride home consisted of me making out with an Asian girl sitting next to my Dad
Hey to make you feel better about last night, I just shit my pants.
What the hell do you have that is more important than a GIANT WATER SLIDE?
Thanks for letting me pee on your bed and cry about nothing to you. You're a real friend
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
While I was giving him head he told me he had to go door to door the next day and "spread the word of Jesus Christ" I felt like a Disney villain out to steal his virtue.
Randomize
