No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
Been at work for four hours and just discovered the chairs in my office double as a napping surface. Most productive thing I've done all day
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
Turns out the old man beside me in the waiting room was dead, but other then that it was a good day.
Pictures of drunk me in a bike helmet are like McDonald's collectible toys. There's sooo many, but NO ONE has seen all of them.
All I want to do on Facebook today is comment on people I knew in high schools profile pictures and tell them how much uglier they are now.
You and your vagina are hellbent on selfdestruction and bad decisions
Dude...can we put that on a tshirt? I will totally sport that shit.
I got titty fucked last night and you're breastfeeding your newborn. Clearly we have gone two totally different paths since 2011.
I offered to trade my cat for a bottle of tequila as long as it had a handle on it and realized I had a problem
If I had your ass I would rule the world
I've been on the cocaine and semen diet for the last 24 hours, lunch sounds great.
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
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