You wanna call me after your homoerotic shower?
She’s leaving for college so I made her a gift basket with all the essentials. You know- Ramen, a 12 pack of PBR, some leftover Plan B pills and a laminated business card for a good lawyer. Damn I’m a good big sister.
she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
Ummm so does anybody remember me stopping to get my ear peirced last night and make an earring out of a staple? Or did I just somehow lay on this thing and ram it through my ear?
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
Last night all you did was whine about how you needed something new and exciting
Is THAT why I woke up with dreadlocks?
What would you do if your asshole suddenly made the sound of a sheep duck baa/quacking the words kill me
You are so incredibly one of a kind, it's astounding
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize
