yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
I found him CRAWLING across the garden. He saw me,smiled,and asked for a napkin.
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
Middle of vacation, he walked into an audition for a Broadway musical in a drunken stupor. I think he got the part.
I walk in and my mom has a Christian workout program playing. It's like, gospel music with an "electronic" beat to go with it. And then they try to save your soul at the end. I hate being home.
He initiated the conversation by sending me a picture of his penis at 4 am
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
for not the first time in my life, my clothes are covered in piss and i'm standing in line waiting to buy pedialyte at a convenience store
starting to feel like a fuck wizard with a magical sixth sense for people fucking.
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
Randomize
