he texted me telling him i gave him the clap. but i think he gave it to me and i gave it back to him
My Mom bought me a vibrating toothbrush. Maybe this is her way of apologizing for throwing away my other thing that vibrated.
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
I bought a bottle of 100 proof for the storm. I am going to drink until I pass out. I'm taking bets. 1:30 pm is the over/under.
My mail consisted of a box of dildos and christmas card from grandma.
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
He SHOWED UP to the party wearing one shoe and a dinosaur hat. He kept lifting up his shirt and asking people to bite his nipple.
You got a blow job by a girl whose nickname is "the terrible tooth"?! You are a brave man.
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
So I just noticed that my last drunk google search before going to bed last night was "ghosts based on gays." I have no idea what that's supposed to mean
Is it acceptable to bring pot to a funeral or am I going to have to do this shit sober?
Randomize
