called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
youre just mad i got the high score on the breathalyzer
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
I was just tagged in a picture with a bunch of people i don't know in a house i don't recognize wearing a purple cowboy hat and a boa...i hate tequila
Semen is not good for contacts.
He waited until after foreplay to tell me that he didn't have a condom and "we" would just have to settle for a bj tonight...
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
BOOM BITCH SERVES YOU RIGHT I HOPE YOU SHIT YOURSELF PETER PAN
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
Its nights like last night that make me want to high five my liver.
Randomize