I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
please hold off on going into labor, i might need you to take me to the free clinic
raced the clock twice to day to see if i could get off before my computer died and before i left for my noon bar crawl... win, win
lets go back to having secrets in our friendship
I just took a shower and found half a cookie melted under my boob. Please tell me there's a reason
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
Well after we were arrested you just kept chanting "Like a good neighbor state farm is there"
People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
He literally stole all the change that was on my floor and ran away while I was peeing. I have to rethink my standards.
Our office went out together for the first time to celebrate the fact our coworker got fired.
I don't blame you. I made YouTube videos of me singing Rent songs then slept with a married couple. Fucking tequila.
Wine through a straw in a subway cup.....classy
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