I dint menn to makr ut w brtendr
Wat???
U lft me at bar, no cassh for cab, may have slept with bartender
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
he's listed in a fb relationship with a girl born in 1993. i'm too drunk to do the math on that one, but i am sober enough to know that's illegal
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
i just traded 2 rolls of toilet paper for half a water bottle of vodka. i love college
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
If a handjob meant commitment I would literally touch zero dicks
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
I mean, you've seen me eat pizza, sober, out of a garbage can, and yet I refuse to go eat at that place. Just sayin....
I don't know what kind of bucket list you have, but having sex with a tree isn't on mine...
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
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