At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
The guy in front of me in lecture is using a fifth of smirnoff as a water bottle.
Nevermind, it's not water.
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
Just assessed the damage in the bath. Two love bites. One bruise on the inner thigh. Strange awareness of what i'm assuming is my cervix. I've definitely missed you. x
Also just realized how inappropriate it looks to other drivers to finish bottles of cheap champagne at stoplights
I asked her if she wanted to make this a permanent exclusive thing instead of a fuck buddy thing, and she just looked at me like I'm an idiot.
That's because you are an idiot.
You missed a lot. I drank contact solution thinking it was water, vodka thinking it was water and some unidentified substance that reminded me of pine sol thinking it was water..
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
You said you were going inside to sober up and then you poured yourself a wine glass of warm gin
She pushed me over. She offered me a shot from her tits. We're good now
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
Randomize