u know u need to get laid when watching mike wazowskis gf from monsters inc makes u horny
Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
It's my diet secret . . . it's like slimfast but I call it cockfast instead.
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
I mean.. listen to "Put It In My Mouth" and you'll get the gist of my voicemail for you.
My wife managed to convince me to not drink everclear by threatening to ban me from her vagina
Googling enemas while I get a pedicure ... My life in one senence
my life is like one bad, slutty lifetime movie.
I don't think I can get drunk, high or horny enough to even consider that
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize
