i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
This is one of those times I wish I had a time machine so I could go back and punch myself in the face to make me realize what I need to do before it's too late
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
Thanksgiving day drinking ended up with me in a shopping cart screaming where are the bitches and condoms. I'd say it went well.
My talents include parallel parking and over reacting about absolutely everything.. And drinking..
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
thought i saw a dude in a kilt yesterday, but then i realized he was doing a walk of shame. happy st. paddy's day.
My roommate has a sixth sense about my jerking off and walks in EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.
He’s exactly what I’m looking for: he’s got a broken heart, a working penis and a new boat!!!
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