I hate fucking guys that don't drink coffee. My morning hangover and shame will not be cured by your stupid tea.
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
I just saw a fat chick ask the bartender to top her corona off with grenandine cuz she has a "sweet tooth" no that's diabetes fatty
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
Dude. I realize why I got sick. 8 shots three beers in an hour. Plus I ate an expired lunchable earlier.
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
I remember you fighting a small man for the last of the pizza. Was there a midget in my house last night?
Do you remember whose house we're in?
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
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