Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
i was way too optimistic last night... got back to my apartment and the porch light was still on, like i'd actually make it all the way home.
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
I kept petting the scarves and telling customers to "feel that shit"
Stop drinking at work.
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
Rehydrating your liver back to life is never a good idea.
Seriously! We need to take her a thank you note or something. She puts up with the drugs and the extremely loud sex. She deserves a thank you card.
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
This guy kept trying to use "see? I'm clean. Cleared by the plasma place today." as a pick up line. This is not okay.
Matt and I's climactic adventure has ended with Matt being hauled off to jail. And now his brother and I are having lunch and a beer.
And that was the night we had mind-blowing sex with the score from Raiders of the Lost Ark blaring on vinyl in the background...
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
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