Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
i'm dressed up like the coppertone baby and being hit on a guy in a monk costume. the irony is not lost on me.
just hooked up with an air force officer in a hotel room paid for by the military. i feel like i should go around thanking taxpayers for the assist.
Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
I would do laundry with you but I vaguely remember swallowing all my quarters last night as some kind of trick.
we knew you were done when they played It's All Coming Back To Me Now by Celine Dion and you started crying
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
i took four shots of tequila, threw my fist up in the air, then went around the party showing everyone how to do the ninja turtle handshake. that's the last thing I remember
He ran into the surf holding up a cigarette yelling "let the Olympic games begin!" So no, no vodka left.
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
One of your snapchats was of you with a 40oz of Mickeys and the caption: "Deep Throat back in her natural habitat"
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
I don't care how many things you caught on fire, it's still not as bad as doing coke and then filming yourself having sex.
Randomize
