Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
I dont even remember coming home... All my stuff is strewn randomly around my apartment... And I woke up at 5 sitting propped up in my bed with just my arm in a shirt
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
I'm going to make "gut the love salmon" a common slang term for sex. Spread the word.
So when I eventually, if ever, find someone I'd like to marry, do you think having people fly to africa for a lion king themed wedding is too much?
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
That feeling when you're ready to convert to the religion of whatever god will stop the vomit. Dynamite is illegal.
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
Mark my words I will never date another cop again. I don't care if he's JESUS.
Only you could go on vacation to visit family and hook up with a pro NFL player from Tinder
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
Did you fill my inhaler with tequila?
Yeah, so?
i'm in a very strange mood rn i'm listening to bruno mars??? am i ok????
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