please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
You asked the dj to play 'who let the dogs out" because it was your birthday. You left the bar and then re-entered to the song
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
My ATM looks so different sober.
I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times
I love that my idea of a romantic gesture to you is to send you a picture of my vomit saying "wish you were here". You voluntarily dated me. For six years ish.
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
I hate when he takes the condom off to cum all over me. It defeats the purpose.
It’s like having a barf bag and choosing to puke in your own lap.
Randomize
