You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
Walked by a shop giving away free donuts this morning. Best walk of shame ever
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
I wish pancakes were everywhere. Just pancakes. I want lilies at my wedding. No dress. Just priest. Just lilies.
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
I'll just be sleeping in this laundry room. Come get me at bar close.
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
I'll have to text you later. Trying to have civilized conversations with the boyfriends parents when I'm 100% aware I just blew their son in the bathroom 5 mins ago. Stay tuned.
I stopped his blowjob to raise 3 fingers & whistle the hunger games tune to the people walking past the window
as a side note pls kill me
I'm not totally useless... You can use me as an example of what not to do
Let's just grow old together and be the crazy ladies that sit on the park bench, drinking booze from flasks and loudly talk about people who walk by.
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
Randomize
