I cockslap morals
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
He kept saying that the puke outside the theater wasn't his and it was all a set up to keep him from partying with the whores. Then he passed out on the sidewalk.
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
My sister was crawling her way home and kept asking us to carry her,then she insisted on grabbing at our ankles til she passed out, how was your night?
Can we skip lunch and do power hour sex time from now on? I'll let you eat nachos off my body if you really need the food.
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
I accidentally flashed three cops last night. Stone cold sober.
DROP EVERYTHING! Gatta go get tested for herpes, lets make an adventure out of it.
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
Currently sifting through all the dick pics and nudes for a picture of my dad and I to post on social media for Father's Day...
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
Never go to your parents' super bowl party. I learned, in great detail, "Why Aunt Trisha is a hoe" Not enough beer on the eastern seaboard.
Randomize
