I'm drive I can fine osifer
why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
First order of business is dropping my 9 am gym class. I'm sweating pure vodka.
two words: fractured penis. two more: emergency room.
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
I have officially made out with every girl you've made out with, even the random you met on the Mexico flight
she left with her roommate. or at least i think she did. but i also just thought i ate candy corn but i'm hal convinced it was candle wax.
My life is sponsored by tidy cat kitty litter, Bacardi rum, and plan b.
As a gentleman, I asked her if she was sure and she just whispered "wreck me" in my ear. I took that as a green light.
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
Randomize
