he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
He keeps saying he loves me and ruining perfectly good conversations.
i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
You were so high you insisted on spoon feeding me your KFC bowl while I was driving.
Was who let the dogs out playing?
Ya. You started barking when it ended
My Bio teacher gave me extra marks for putting "deer with AK-47 seeking retribution" at the top of the food chain on my exam. 51% pass here i come!!
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
Ended up getting hot boxed in a limo with a bunch of asians going to a karaoke bar. I think I pretended to understand their language for a solid hour. Am I bilingual now?
He used the panoramic camera on his iPhone to take a picture of his dick. And it actually filled it. Pretty sure I just came.
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
Randomize
