If that was your dad, he is hot
Pete just told the whole party I'm a squirter
well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
i was calling myself "cat the lion" and tried eating the computer mouse because i thought it was "my prey"
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
Just saw my bank statement. It literally goes liquor store pizza place liquor store pizza place bar bar bar liquor store pizza place 711 for snacks withdrawl for drugs rinse and repeat
Fact: Chilis at the airport in JAX will serve you shots of jack at 6:45 with breakfast. Ya I missed my flight.
So when does your new flight leave?
At my shot/hour ratio.... I leave in 16 shots. I love flying
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
wouldn't be a true Fourth of July without dropping acid at 9pm on a Monday
FREEDOM
Nah, just stick him in a closet with some cheetos, a blunt and soda. The darkness will calm him down until Mallory can be located.
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
Randomize
