Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
Life lesson: Don't ever put your penis in a crazy girl. Especially if she's married. And has a kid.
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
Sorry for screaming that you were an apple in spanish at the bar last night, that was the wine talking
Just did a drug deal on the toy aisle at walmart, Merry Christmas
Look, as a friend I'm asking to see a picture of his tiny dick
i looked down and was like "oh shit thats blood" then it was like "shit, thats not my blood." then it was like whos blood is this??
IM TRYING TO BE RESPONSIBLE AND ALL I WANT TO DO IS FUNNEL CHEAP BEER AND SCREAM ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE OUR NATION
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
apparently my buddy was fucking on our couch downstairs so i decided it was necessary to walk downstairs naked in a hockey mask.
Would you still love me if my nipple fell off?
You said "this is only my eighth drink" with like 6 separate drinks
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
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