So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
I bought a boat. Want to have sex on The Angry Clam? That's what I named it.
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
And we started making out. She asked me to pick a number between 1 and 10. I said 6. She took me to her room. A few minutes later I wasnt a virgin. DUDE I WAS GOING TO SAY 2.
once i realized i was actively trying to drink the beer i was sweating out of my body i knew it was time to go to bed
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
I'm gonna call it the Reunion Tour. Hooked up with two different ex girlfriends in one day...
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
She tackled him mid-puke while the other two were cutting up a $60 dildo with a kitchen knife and putting the pieces in a Corona bottle.
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.
HE PEED ON ME. THE MANAGER OF THE BAR.
according to the calendar even that i put in my phone last night, i'm supposed to fuck shit up at 11am today... i really hope i didn't miss something important
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