whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
Tonight must have been good, I have already had two cups of coffee but still couldn't figure out how to operate a door.
probably shouldnt have written that paper while wasted, its starts with once upon a time
i tried to stop you but you kept shouting "two birds with one stone!"
I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
Something smells like weed and I think it might be my mascara. Come sniff my eyes
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
I'm currently braless eating the balls of the penis cake and drinking warm champagne. I'm 3 cats away from crazy at this point
Got home last night and found a Big Mac in the shower, tampons all over the place, and two pairs of your panties on the front porch.
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
if you fuck our toilet off the wall again, i'm going to be so mad.
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
Wall of shame with a backpack full of beer bottles, cowboy hat in hand, and a handlebar mustache. I was applauded by a passing car
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
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