Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
I didn't know it was possible to make picking up dog shit look sexy.
She did the bend and snap...
One of my preschool students told me today that it's not pollution that makes the water in lakes unclean. It's the hobos. I was absolutely speechless. And just so proud.
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
Last night we looked at each other with an expression of "fuck I am so done being normal", took off our shirts, and danced around in our bras
im just laying here pukin in my mouth and swallowing it 'cause im WAY too lazy to actually get up and find a place to vomit. this is my life now.
WHY DIDN'T YOU INVITE ME TO RUN THROUGH TACO BELL'S SPRINKLERS AT 4AM?!
Wait.....I ate a raw potato lastnight.
Can we talk about the fact that a stranger is doing a line of coke off our living room table right now?
I stole an accordion from the bar
Accidentally
I'm having ragrets about stealing the accordion
I'm glad I date someone who likes the simple things. Sex, kittens, and McDonald's.
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
I think that living in the "now" is the worst fucking ghandi buddha whatever advice bc that means I'm just gonna get drunk in the now.
He let me share his family pack of hot pockets with him. Chivalry isn't dead after all.
Randomize
