I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
Replacing day drinking with a real job was the worst decision I've ever made.
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
I saw you eating fruit and doing shots off people passed out
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
He sat next to me, put his arm around me, yelled at his girlfriend that he was breaking up with her, and told me I'm his little pet for the night.
Dude you're fine. You're 5 minutes away from your house and you're eating fig newtons
i woke up in a bed of pop tarts
I said "one day" and that day is not today
Maybe life is about finding the person you DO want to cuddle with after they rail you like a porn star
I'll text you tomorrow when I'm not in someone's torture cave if I don't by noon call for help.
Randomize
