What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
He told me he had herpes after I put his hotdog in my mouth
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.
Hypothetically going to the gym on coke was a good idea
Imma do me. And by that, I mean I'm going to walk across campus still drunk at 9am on a Tuesday.
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
Is it weird that I only look up my ex on Twitter when I take a shit? May have conditioned myself to associate him with shit
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
Please tell me why I’m standing naked in the kitchen drinking pickle juice out of the jar & there is a container of potatoe salad with no lid & a spoon in it on the floor 🤦♀️
Randomize
