i was out of cigarettes so i took the butts out of the ashtray, emptied them out, and proceeded to roll one big Frankenstein cigarette.
My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
the only time i'm productive on weed is when i drink.
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
Hon, I found you crying into a bathrobe in the back of a closet with a broken shoerack.
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
The only thing I like when I am high is sex. And Cheez Its. But mostly sex.
In other news, people don't judge you when you buy a vibrator if you buy a funny birthday card and bag with it. I learned that this weekend.
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
ONE DAY CAN WE PLEASE HAVE SECRET SEX. PREFERABLY IN AN ANCIENT PYRAMID BUT I'M NOT OPPOSED TO A 4 STAR HOTEL
Randomize
