He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
I'm not conventionally pretty...I'm just crazy
Her "get-your-paper-done-early-blowjob" incentive is the thing that has successfully deterred my procrastination
if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
seriously. next time...underwear. I'm not spending any other holiday season wondering if it'll be my last babyless one.
We didn't talk. I watched you drop an egg on the floor. And watched you praise your haunted broom.
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
They ran out of toilet paper so I used the rug to wipe my vagina
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
Just in case you forgot, you puked all over your boss house, pissed on his coffee table, and were then thrown out by his wife
Randomize
