We can make salsa ya know, maybe even some hot sauce. That doesn't mean we're married.
your ex dropped by. you can call me dwight howard, cuz im the king of rebounds
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
Gave the kid in the wheelchair at the bus stop a beer and proceede to lift him on the bus. porch drinking brings out the best in everyone
I have a callous on the palm of my hand just below my ring finger that is entirely from opening so many beer bottles. I'm strangely proud right now.
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow.
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
Crappy Mother's Day to you! Those of us who don't have children fill the void with hot sex, sleeping in, more sex, leisurely suntanning, foreign travel, overseas sex, paying cash for sports cars, watching TV, having sex on the floor in front of TV porn, lounging around the house, or whatever the hell we want.
The cat be actin like a 2:30 am poop is the time to tell me all about her thoughts and fears in life. No bitch, this is definitely alone time.
Why are we so great
Like I'm def going to a therapist but I wouldn't change a thing about us except maybe the peeing
rowboat hit a rock. taking on water. going down fast. bring cheerios.
aye aye capn
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
My GF, FWB and Side piece are all booty calling me. I’m a victim of my sexual success
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